They’re At The Post….
On Our Way
Monday November 10/25
10:03 am
What a morning! I called for an Uber at 7:10 am, knowing already that I was pushing the envelope. I was told to be at Terminal 3 by 8:00 am.
For those of you who haven’t used Uber yet, you book it by tapping an icon on your smartphone. You are required to key in your destination at that time.
Who knew there were two Terminal 3s, and that one of them was a restaurant in downtown Toronto? And wouldn’t you know it, it was to that restaurant that we were headed.
At first, I thought the driver was just taking an alternate route to avoid traffic. However, when we were still going in the wrong direction after 15 minutes, I started getting worried.
“Why are we headed away from the airport?” I asked the driver.
“Because we’re not going to the airport,” he replied.
“Well, now we are,” I said, “Turn this thing around.”
“I can’t. You have to cancel this trip and start a new one with Uber, then another driver will pick you up here.”
“I haven’t got time for that”
“Those are the rules.”
“How strict are those rules when there’s 50 dollars in it for you?”
“Let’s go,” he said.
So he got me there by 8:30, and I figured I was in for a scolding. Perhaps the fates decided I needed a break because I got my boarding pass, checked two bags, got through security, and made it to the gate five minutes before the other guys.
10:50 am
Still haven’t taken off.
!0:56
Finally, we are de-iced and ready to go. I forgot to mention that it’s suddenly winter here in southern Ontario. About 3 inches of snow have accumulated, and ordinarily, I would feel festive and Christmassy. But I have to pick up a keyboard at Long and McQuade in Nanaimo by 6:00 pm. I won’t have a second chance tomorrow as it is closed for Remembrance Day.
11:11
We’re finally rolling down the runway, one hour and eleven minutes late. This means we arrive in Victoria at 1:45 PST. It will take half an hour to get our bags, another half hour to rent a vehicle, and two hours to drive to Nanaimo. We can get to the music store by 5:00 if there are no snags ……What am I talking about? There are always snags.
To put things in a crude but figuratively accurate way: If I don’t get there in time to pick up that keyboard, I’m fucked.
Still, I’m full of optimism that God, Lady Luck, and the Universe itself are all on my side.
1:35
Across the aisle and down a few rows from me is a little girl. Her chronic loud banter was cute for a while, but now she just annoys me with her limitless yapping. She’s a wellspring of meaningless babble, punctuated only by the occasional world-weary “yes” and “uh-huh” from a lady that I assume is her mother. I’m certainly not an advocate of muzzling children like you would a noisy dog, but a well-placed Covid mask right now would, I’m sure, draw applause from rows five to fifteen.
Good Hats
2:05
Those of you who have been following this blog will remember my complaints about how cramped it was on the private jet we travelled in. This one is worse! And in combination with the next-to-no sleep I had last night, it’s a perfect storm for my restless leg syndrome.
I started flopping around like a freshly caught tuna. I thought I recalled (wrongly as it turns out) putting my anti-flop meds in my suitcase, which was currently living in the baggage hold of the airplane. After fifteen minutes of frantically digging through my carry-on bag, I found the medication. The timing was excellent as the flight attendant was delivering beverages and snacks. So damn the torpedoes, I decided to wash the four large capsules down with an early afternoon glass of wine (FREE, believe it or not!).
Cheers
This is my first time on Porter Airlines. They’re based in Toronto and have been around for thirty years or so, with the lowest fares and the best service. Unfortunately, they only flew to Montreal and Ottawa until ten years ago, when they purchased larger aircraft and began servicing western Canada. Free beer and wine! Ya gotta love it!
Oops…. seat belt light is on. Turbulence ahead.